Forgotten treasure

While this is my first blog and first attempt at consistently writing, I have been writing for many years. I have written short stories, poems, stories for kids, and mostly journals. This week, I found some old writings and journal entries and think I may pull some out from time to time. Reading my own words from the past actually inspire and motivate me on my journey now!

November 6, 2004

I am extremely unsure of myself as a person first, but also as a writer. As I embark on this unknown journey, it scares me. I know that I enjoy writing and I relish in words on a daily basis. I love the spoken word and I love the written word. Words in and of themselves when strung together with creativity and eloquence can move hearts and spirits. They can motivate, inspire, and challenge. I recognize that the only way my words, written or otherwise, can do those things is if they are given to me by God. My finite mind cannot put words together in any form of creativity or eloquence that move hearts and souls without the direction and leading of the Holy Spirit! I can be quippy and I can come up with relevant word pictures until I am blue in the face, but MY words will not reach people in a profound way! Because obedience has never been a quality I possess in masses, writing is a scary journey. I realize that I can rely solely on my love for the word and my creative energy and my writing is going to flounder at best! Or I can choose to be obedient to the ideas, time, and words that God provides for me and He will establish my desire and gift.

A blast from my past still rings true for me today, maybe more so, and inspires me. Looks like we can revisit the whole "obedience" piece at a later date....again!

365 days

What would it look like for me to find a way to be consistent...for the first year...and write for 365 days straight? What would it look like to push through the ruts, dull drums, and boredom daily life brings? What would it look like to write through pain, sorrow, trouble, and tears? What would it look like to write on a day I had nothing to say? What would that journey bring to my soul and to the world around me?

I'm not totally sure, and it's a bit scary! But, I'm afraid we are about to find out the answer to those questions, and maybe more!

Little Shove

Have you ever felt like there are divine hands on your back getting ready to give you a little shove in a new direction? A time where you keep hearing the same thing in disconnected places. A time where too many coincidences happen way too quickly. A time where your life is a web of confusion, but if you stop for just a minute and look into the center on the web, it begins to come into focus. Yeah, me too!

I'm making a choice to give into that shove rather than push against it, thus this blog. You see, I made a vow to myself when I was 15 and I've been running from it ever since. I can clearly remember the day. I sat in English class on the second floor of Western High School in Las Vegas. My teacher had just handed me a paper I had written and delivered it with a lofty compliment. I told myself that day, "Maybe I was created to write, maybe this was a gift, maybe I have something to say...and IF I was created to do this and IF it was a gift, then I should definitely do that some day!"

Vows we make with ourselves are unique because they aren't just in our head, they are in our souls. God has a funny way of reminding us of the things we say to ourselves, to others, and even to Him. It takes a significant amount of faith to keep any vow, to answer a call, or to exercise a gift. So, I guess I'm a bit stubborn and a bit slow, but here I am ____ years later (Ha! You thought I was going to tell!!) doing what I told myself and God I would do.

I'm not totally sure what it says about me that it took decades and a divine shove to get me to obey, but I suppose we can explore that another time!